Last weekend, my nephew B. turned one. My sister-in-law texted a video of B. babbling "ma-ma" (paternal grandmother in Cantonese) and "ye ye" (paternal grandfather) over and over again. I smiled at his cuteness and my sister-in-law's diligence in practicing greetings with him. My heart filled with pride.
I am tickled pink every time my two and a half year old niece, P., announces herself on FaceTime with an enthusiastic "Dai gu-gu!" (eldest aunt on father's side). Her very next request is usually "Hagrid?" Come to think of it, P.'s greeting sounds more like, "Dai gu-gu-Hagrid!"
Every now and then, P. is so excited to see Hagrid that she blurts out Hagrid's name first, at which point she is instantly corrected by the adults around her: "No, P., you must greet Dai gu-gu first!" She promptly and dutifully corrects her error and then squeals, "Hagrid Hagrid Hagrid" until I point the phone at my dog.
In Chinese culture, every interaction begins with a proper greeting. It is a sign of respect for elders, a ritual that all children are taught as soon as they begin to verbalize. There are strict conventions governing the etiquette of greetings:
- Proper greetings include honorifics.
- The younger greets the elder first, and must do so standing up.
- Where there is a power differential, the junior greets the senior (also standing up--it would be impolite to remain seated during a greeting).
Even though I've lived in America for three quarters of my life so far, anytime a proper greeting is not offered, I still bristle a little. Who walks into a classroom and doesn't greet the teacher? That's one I still haven't gotten over after all these years.
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| Greetings to the world from Hagrid |
I think it's a great tradition and wished children had that kind of respect today! We've lost a lot of manners and each year I teach it seems less.
ReplyDeleteMy great nephew if turning one tomorrow. They are so full of energy at that age. I love that proper respect it taught at such an early age. This is something I know we are missing in this country.
ReplyDeleteAhh this one hits ome, especially when you ask who enters a classroom without greeting the teacher first? Unfortunately, almost everyone! I went to Catholic school. That would never have happened there! Another nice piece that shares your culture. Thanks, Michelle!maribethbatcho
ReplyDeleteThis afternoon I made a kid exit my room and re-enter respectfully. (He came in late, while the rest of his classmates were taking a quiz, by making a loud noise.) He was upset at first. I think it was the right choice!
ReplyDeleteHagrid! Hagrid! Just joking. I love how your niece and nephew are learning proper greetings early on. Respect is key! I have to say your piece had me smiling especially when you wondered if your niece had been saying, "Dai gu-gu-Hagrid!" I love how you captured her enthusiasm. When she sees Hagrid face to face, she must be so excited! The greetings are very specific, i.e. Paternal Eldest Aunt. I love it! Yes, I often do my Haitian "Oh Oh" when students enter the classroom without a greeting.
ReplyDeleteI think Southerners are similar in their insistence on greetings. We work on greetings and titles for everyone, though he still leaves out the Mr. or Mrs., he gets the names and he is learning that being respectful is important. It drives me nuts that kids in general don't do it, but my sister gets compliments all the time about how well-behaved her kids are. It matters!
ReplyDeleteI adore that your fuzzy dog is named Hagrid. It's funny; I don't think of formal greetings as foundational manners, but I do notice and appreciate it when students greet me upon entering and say goodbye when they leave. So I guess maybe it's more important to me than I realized!
ReplyDeleteI still refer to my friends' parents using the honorifics Mr. & Mrs. even though I am 47. Manners are a way of showing respect. I notice and appreciate when kids (my own and others) say please and thank you and greet me when they see me!
ReplyDeleteI'm a literacy coach. When I teach, I stand at the door and greet kids by name when they come in. That ensures that they greet me! I love your cute Hagrid! I have her twin, Boo, at my house.
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